Fine Fifty Grands!

What is now known as a Dollar Shop, used to exist even in my childhood.  My contemporaries will recall itinerant vendors as also kiosks with a voice or poster tag of something like "Har maal milega 4 aane."  The tag translates to "Any item for 25 paise."

The government seems to have seen taken a fancy to this style of selling.  Only it is not selling anything but imposing fines.  As any government worth its salt has to think big, the uniform fine is not for a piffling dollar or 25 paise but a grand ₹50,000, roughly $800!  Here are some of the fines on the list:

• Rs 50,000 fine for dumping waste within 500 metres of Ganga,
• NGT orders Rs 50,000 fine for dumping waste into Ganga,
• ₹50,000-fine for plastic ban violation,
• Fine flight caterers Rs 50,000 if their vans lack rodent repellents,
• 5 year Jail-time, Rs 50,000 fine for doctors involved in cut practice,
• Up to Rs 50,000 fine for holding old notes,
• Rs. 50,000 fine for airlines if planes empty human waste on air,
• traffic violations: Rs 50,000 fine for Holi drunken brawls,
• Rs 50,000 fine on disposing of construction material on streets

(To know more about any of these fines, just copy the item and paste it into the Google search bar.)

While I am not aware how will the act of an airline in disposing off human waste in the air be detected, I am not much worried about it for the airlines can easily afford to pay the fine.

Many of these fines are applicable to individuals too, and are to be paid on the spot. Most of the violators are not likely to have that much cash in their possession notwitstanding newly issued notes of ₹2K denomination.  Many wouldn't even have that much balance in their bank account or the credit card limit.

This opens up a new business opportunity for the banks.  They could enter into an arrangement with the government on these lines:

• The person fined 50K has to be Aadhaar verified on a terminal carried by the official imposing the fine.
• The fine is to be debited to his bank account linked to Aadhaar.  If the Aadhaar is not linked to an account, the fine is to be doubled and the culprit given a week to get the linking done and present himself before the fining authority.
• Any overdraft in the account or the credit card on account of payment of the fine is to be converted into a loan payable in 50 monthly instalments and to carry interest at a rate to be notified by the government from time to time.
• Any default in payable of an instalment to result in an automatic fine of ₹50K payable to the bank in the manner described above.
• If the total fine payable by a citizen leads to a situation of insolvency all his assets to stand automatically transferred to the bank.

Though this looks like an excellent scheme to me, some banker friends feel that it will not translate into business because of the LDKRD# factor.  In their opinion the LDKRD rate may stabilize somehwere between 10 and 20 percent. What is your opinion?

# Le De Kar Rafa Dafa

DIY - What A Relief!

When I bought my split AC, the salesman took pains to drive the point home that the installation and three services during the first year were free.  Two months later, I called the customer care and could manage to reach a human being after navigating the labyrinthine IVR menu.  He first confirmed all my contact details and then confirmed the model and month of purchase before registering my request for service.

It was only after the service technician arrived, almost at lunch time, that I could find a link between the prohibitive cost of the AC and prohibition!  The chap informed me that the three free services will consist of two 'dry' and one 'wet' service.  Being curious, I asked him, against his advice, to do the wet service first.

After the fellow had put his bag down and taken a good look at the AC, he asked me for the original invoice.  Having inspected it, he inquired if there was a stepladder in the house, which was duly brought.  He climbed up, took off the front cover of the indoor unit and handed it to me with a request to put it down carefully.  Next in the list of ever unfolding demands, he asked for a bowl of soap water, a toothbrush, two pieces of cleaning cloths.  By the time he finished, the white floor tiles directly below the unit had become quite a mess.

Once he was done with the room unit, he carried the stepladder to the outdoor unit and asked for a water hose and a piece of string to tie to the nearest tap.  Not finding the tap pressure good enough, he asked me if there was a pump and a direct tap.  He was shown the tap, and the motor was switched on.  After he finished, the wall on which the unit was mounted and the floor below it had become pretty dirty.  When pointed out, he did spray some water on the wall to wash it.

It must not be difficult to visualize that instead of watching and enjoying the free service, I was kept on my toes all along.  Finally the fellow got his service report signed and stepped out.  He had barely started his motorcycle when my household help came to me and conveyed her displeasure at having to clean the floor once again.  She also recommended that next time I should call the technician early in the morning before her arrival.  I was pretty exhausted.

It was pretty late by the time I recovered and sat down for my lunch.  The lunch did help to somewhat lift my sagging spirits.

And it was at this point that I resolved to service my AC myself (DIY - Do It Yourself,) free services notwithstanding.  I have been doing a pretty good job of it and I always do it early in the morning to avoid the wrath of my maid and delayed lunch.  It is such a huge relief.